The Queen has arrived!
I've given her the finest room I could create: Gold, Silver and Platinum abound.
Even the most wonderful table our master smiths could devise:
Our finest engravers brought forth their craft to ensure that the entirety of her room was covered in depictions of the past and statues cast from silver and platinum adorn the room itself.
Because of her frail constitution and the value I place in our dwarven heritage, I took the liberty of installing iron bars across the entrance to the room in order to protect our beloved monarch from the cruelty of goblin malice and bestial rage.
Nothing shall be able to enter in order to cause her harm.
LONG LIVE RAKUST DANGLEDTORCH, QUEEN OF THE DWARVES
Since she's a bloody vampire, that's going to be a very long time.
“She'd become a governess. It was one of the few jobs a known lady could do. And she'd taken to it well. She'd sworn that if she did indeed ever find herself dancing on rooftops with chimney sweeps she'd beat herself to death with her own umbrella.”
― Hogfather