Funny Captcha Challenges

[Zaleramancer]

Character Alignment: Pyromaniac Good
Character Race: The race of humans. They move at incredible speeds. They are well-known for their drug dens and temples. They barely control a water-based city-state that is the site of many ancient tombs. They were created as part of a breeding experiment that went horribly wrong.
Character Appearance: This composed woman has narrow brown eyes. Her silky, wavy, chestnut hair is worn in a style that reminds you of a wave of water. She is tall and has a lithe build. Her skin is black. She has high cheekbones and prominent ears. Her wardrobe is attractive, with a lot of white and gray.
Magic:This magical style focuses on both rock and plant life. It requires various gemstones and guiding magical forces with the mind itself. This style of magic requires the caster to store and release magical energy.
Personality:The tough, bullying seer who is considered the best in her profession.

What else do I need..

[Zaleramancer]

I found an interesting Weird Science generator.

Ever wonder what a Stereoentomoinformaticist does?

[Zaleramancer]

Or how about Cyberpunk Classes?

Mediatron? Cybernetic Dynasecretary? Advanced Autolawyer?

[Celadon's Penultimate]

Enlighten me.

[Zaleramancer]

On what a Stereoentomoinformaticist?

They study three dimensional computing systems that utilize insects.

Mediatrons are robotic news anchors, Cybernetic Dynasecretaries are very popular as discrete bodyguards and Advanced Autolawyer can defend and prosecute you at the same time!

[Zaleramancer]

So, I've decided to entertain myself (And possibly the rest of you) by playing Adventure mode in Dwarf Fortress, and posting the day-by-day play through of what's happening.











So, I decide to do the obvious and harass the locals for quests.




They apparently have a Werebeast half a day's travel from their little hamlet. It can only be harmed by copper in animal form..

Good thing I have a copper dagger, eh?

Traveling North East until about Noon, I reach the Lair of the Werebeast.



It's a rather long tunnel, leading to....



Scary! Luckily, He's not currently in whatever bestial form he possesses. Dealing with him as a human should be fairly easy.



He took two arrows to the chest and a final one to the head. My character remains unscratched.

It doesn't appear that there's any loot to be gained, so I guess It's time to hot foot it to the nearest village. I don't want to be outside when night falls.

There's Boogeymen. They rip you to shreds.

I make it back to town in record time, and harass another villager for quests. He directs me to another Werebeast Lair.

This one is some crazy woman.

She charges, and a few arrows later, goes down.

I remain uninjured.



Once again disappointed by the lack of loot,  I run back across the bridge to town.



It's early afternoon, but I'm reluctant to risk another venture. I really don't want to be caught outside at night.

Time to find someone's house to invade.

I find a nice (Crowded House) and, after taking a drink from the local well, settle down for the day.



I also notice that my character is still covered in human blood.

No wonder I got a place to stay so easily. My character must look terrifying.

I'll have to find some food tomorrow. My character is starting to get hungry.

ZZZZZZZZ

[Zaleramancer]

No one wants to post? Alright, I'll just keep going. :P

Day Two!

It's time to hunt before my character starves to death.

So, after wandering for a bit in what appears to be a desert, I find a "Pouched Rat".



(It's the lowercase R)


And I re-discover one of the wonderful things about elves. Animals all treat them as friends. Which apparently prevents me from firing a bow at them.

Spent a good five minutes or so trying to stab the rat. (It kept dodging.)

And.. I can't eat it.



Same thing happened with a flock of buzzards.



And the second flock of Buzzards.



Found me some Ostriches!

Time to stab them!


Success! Ten minutes or so stabbing at it, and it puked on my way to much, but I killed one!

Now, to slay all the others.

[Philote]

This should be interesting

[Zaleramancer]

I know no longer need to hunt for food.

Ever again.

Three ostriches worth of food in my backpacks.

Now, what to do..

[Zaleramancer]

Alright!

Two backpacks of food.

I return to town!



And harass the humans for quests.

I get another werebeast. Two.

And a bandit! Something new! :D



I decide to go for the bandits, I leave my very heavy backpacks behind in a safe inclosure. Speed is everything now.

STEALTH! I'm hoping I can sneak close, and then use arrows.  



How.. Anti-Climatic. He never even realized I was there. Even after getting several arrows in his torso.

He fell over and I just stabbed him to save arrows.

Well.. Time to steal his stuff.



Oh, hey, It's Camels. HI CAMELS!

Grab my backpack, move back to the loot-er-Dead dood..

When, suddenly...



I run into another Bandit.

Who attacks me with an Axe.

Shiiiiiit.

Wait.. Wait.. Nevermind. I shot him in the leg and he fell over.

Wheew.



Time to loot!

Looting..Lootin-

ANOTHER BANDIT!

He went down too. With only a single arrow.

Well, maybe I can loot them without ANOTHER one showing up.

HA!  A bandit was poking around the edge of my vision, so I took a shot at him.

One hit kill baby!





Now, continue looting~

I got all the bandits, and the treasures they had in their little camp.

Now, back to town!

[Zaleramancer]

My recent Bandit Slayings in comic form:

[Zaleramancer]

I must have missed this thread.

It's so adorable to watch people panic about subliminal messages hidden in videos that can only be heard if you play it really fast, reversed and in a random order.

[Celadon's Penultimate]

 Have you ever watched any of the videos?

Some are plain ridiculous, but others are frightening in their ability to make connections, and make coincidence seem less...coincidental.

[Zaleramancer]

If you look hard enough, you can see anything in anything.

True Story.

[Celadon's Penultimate]

 But what if they're right?

[Zaleramancer]

Yep.

Japanese Pop Boybands are totally in league with infernal powers.

[Celadon's Penultimate]

And it's so ridiculous? This from a person who reads sci-fi and fantasy on the regular?

How many times has it turned out that the college professor was actually in league with alien overlords bent on taking over the planet, or the entire story turning out to be the dream of a character who's just a character in somebody else's dream within a dream?

To hear the conspiracy folks tell it, they make those situations sound absurd, so that when you hear the real thing, you'll equate it with those "fictional" stories.

And to be truly honest, if demons truly do exist, I'd expect them to take the least expected route: using people (as is their nature) without the people even knowing that they're tools of malevolent forces.

Did you ever see the movie, The Faculty? A similar conspiracy is mentioned there.

[Zaleramancer]

Happy Birthday.

I'd think unholy spirit-critters older than most of human civilization would know better than to try to gain domination over humanity through.. boybands.

I mean, have some dignity. No one's that desperate.

[Celadon's Penultimate]

 Thanks.

And I'm not saying it's true, but I'm open to consider lots of different options. I mean, think about it. Satan didn't come to Eve by jumping into her body and making her head spin around; he just tried to speak to her and make her not believe what God said to be true. The plan was simple, and yet nearly cost mankind their eternal souls in Hell.

At least, if you let us crazy Christians tell it.

I wouldn't be shocked if they did something so simple as placing subliminal messages in music. It would certainly explain why music sounds so creepy played backward (rather than just annoying and discordant).

And think about this. What's a common way of fantasy seducers to take control of their victims? Through their good looks and a pleasing voice (commonly a song).

Even through mythology. The Sirens. Lorelei. The Nixes. The Nymphs. The Satyrs. The Incubi. The Succubi. There's plenty of mythological seducer beings in history, who have been said to use their looks and/or voice to entrance folks. Just consider if demons were among those ranks, and if they finally found a way to do it without getting caught.

[Zaleramancer]

Everything sounds creepy recited backwards.