I shall TELL you what happened to me.
The Internet was supposed to be set up last Wednesday. And then it wasn't.
Then it was supposed to be back up on the following Thursday. And then it wasn't.
Finally, when I grew all but homicidal about my poor internet being down, God saw fit to spare the lives of those I intended on hurting (those poor unwitting Comcast people, the incompetent ignoramuses), and let them come today. An hour AFTER the latest time they said they'd be here.
So there. My very nice, censored version of telling you that the internet is back up for our family.
“…Judge not what a man has done, but judge what he could have done if he was a different bloke altogether. For art thou a leper? And a leper can changeth his spots…” --Rudy Wade, Misfits (Series 4, Episode 8)